Saturday, December 19

eversince i've been staying home, my body clock always make me wake up anytime from 3am to 4am. whenever i wake up, i have the urge to pee eventhough its just a little amount of pee. and the short walk from my room to the toilet gives me the freak sense if you know what i mean. as time passes by i no longer sense if it was my body clock that wakes me up... maybe it was something else. but tonight, it was different. i remember knocking off before 1am.... had a bad dream which left me with cold sweat. the incident which i skidded a month ago kept rewinding in my dream. i always thought that i was okay. but true enuff as what the psycho-trauma doctor told me, it will come back. but in this dream, i dreamt that i did not survive. the worst part was, nobody even cared if i live or die. so here i am right now at 4am having deep thoughts about my current situation. it makes me think that sometimes after all this while being at home, i am lonely. i sleep 12 hours a day and sometimes i will force myself to sleep even more just to pass the day off. most of the time, nobody is at home, even if parents are at home, i will be in my room most of the time. hmm..

Izan blogged @ 12/19/2009 03:58:00 AM

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