| Friday, September 30 |
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[WOW] (burp). Carl's Jr was .....(burp)........ GOOD. Damn feeling burger. Having a almost 10bucks meal on burger, fries and free flow of drinks for LUNCH makes u feel so lazy to go back to office cos you know....(burp)...... you will be falling asleep when your stomach is full.... (yawnz). next week onwards will be my last working week at ntuc income. Im posted to Nanyang Polytechnic during morning from 3oct - 7oct. By noon, be back at office then by 4pm will be at NYP again till 5pm. siok ah, can KENG like shit ah i tell you. Life is so good here. Its like im paid to enjoy. when i was in Keppel for attachment, everything was so called disicpline yet the pay was so little. but down here in ntuc income, i slack like a king, yet get paid well. hahahaha. NICE. (burp) till then...... BURPS to you all. hahahaha. you guys should try Carl's Jr at marina square man. |
| Wednesday, September 28 |
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FUCK. just 2mins ago i tried to publish my entry. but it failed. now its gone. so pissed. nvm, i think i could still remember some of it. anyway, i was saying that i've just realised that i only had 6days break from work since 11april. that was when i went to bangkok for 6days. damn it dude. im tired. my ntuc income contract ends this week. i was thinking if they were to extend my contract... should i or should i not accept it? my main motivation to wake up in the morning everyday is for money. work = money! haha. like what i said on my previous entry, i shall not look back at the past. why should i frown and be sad all the time? why should i care so much when that person doesnt even bother to care? why should i still love her so much when she's still dating other guys? why am i wasting my life away by being sad when i can choose to be normal? yes, memories, it hurts. i just want to be my ownself. like a child with no worries. i want to concentrate on my goal. i wanna put my business as a priority now. alot of things to be done and follow up. i got a 2-day roadshow at takashimaya this coming january! =) goodnight! |
| Saturday, September 24 |
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good god, i had almost 12hours of sleep just now! i can only sleep this long during weekends. last week, i had some weird dream. i dream about this girl and i know this girl in real life. we had a rough ride, we fought so much. then one day we were trying to patch things up... i had almost 38 Unread Messages on my phone. i was on the 3rd message........ and you know what? i didnt get to read the rest cos my alarm rang(anti climax sia...!!). i want to know the rest of the 35 outstanding messages! haha. wierd. oh, yesterday i had lunch with someone new. thanks to serene who helped to fix the lunch together. seriously, im moving at the right path in my life. i dont wish to look behind. you know, different people have different style in leading their own lives and solving their problems... for me.... i just want to run and keep on running from things that are very disturbing. i can see that going to bangkok is a source of escapism for me. great.. =) |
| Wednesday, September 21 |
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[the virgin feeling] i still can't believe im 20. age is catching up real fast. i still want to enjoy my life as a teenager. i have 6more months before graduating, 1 more year before NS and a life to live. i just wanna be pure; a child, again. just yesterday, i spoke to a doctor who conducted a class which i helped to organise at NTUC. he asked me... Dr. Kevin Seah: So you are a temp staff in NTUC? You know you can gradually slowly get a permanent job in here you know? me: oh, its okay. its only temporary.. im still a student. Dr. Kevin Seah: oh really? you don't look like one. but anyway, what course are you in?.... *and the conversation continues...* damn it la. im still 20 okay. why must he say that i dont look like a student? do i look that old to you? |
| Monday, September 19 |
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[hello and goodbye] well, we fetched him and sent him back. Though it was a short weekend, it is just nice when u have a friend who will take a flight from his hometown and visit us. I was at the aiport after work today... after edward left... i kept thinking... when is it going to be my turn to get out from this country for a while. i shall just wait.... and then dissapear for a week. surprisingly, i already had plans for my 21st birthday eventhough it is like 7months away... haha. damn it balls. working 8.30am-5.20pm everyday is kinda boring. if only lunch break is longer, and i have something to do after work... life is so much better. |
| Sunday, September 18 |
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[i have issues man! damn it!] I have so many issues to talk about. Look, here are the list of things that girls make a big deal out of it when choosing a guy. He has got to have money, nice car, and for malay girls.... a bike will do (dont blame me on this la okay, even my chinese friends say so)... so fuck yeah! and another thing, the guy must have a stable job and already pass his NS life. like duh, whats the different? they both still can love you right? its damn stupid you know when girls give reasons of not getting a guy who have not serve his NS. Reasons such as 1) they spend less time when he goes to NS. 2) they are scared that they might flirt with other guys when the boyfriend goes to NS. 3) bad company of friends in NS who will influence her boyfriends. well, if you think that we will have bad company of friends in NS who will influence us, then why dont you think of those guys who have completed their NS? they also still keep in contact that might be a bad influnce right? DUH! k la thats all about my issues. anyway, im just talking generally about girls... so if any of you are against this entry, let me show you something.... take this: __ and get the fuck out from here. =) and this is statement is such an ego booster: IM GOD IN MY BLOG. =) hahaha. edward is back in town for a few days. my weekends was okay... i expected it to be fun but it was kinda boring and wasted. saturday, had street soccer at telok blanga heights. then went to bud's place.... damn it la, why must he be sick. anyway, after we fetch edward from changi airport, we had ice cream at swensen at town... and that was bloody 1am. we were suppose to go sentosa the next day... but nuh and irwank pangseh us. suay lor.. and i received information from my sugar baby who was at sentosa for the terry fox fun... duh she said it started to rain in sentosa ard 11am....so yeah, screw it. and so by tmr, a brand new week, a brand new life. chill..... |
| Friday, September 16 |
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a thorn for every heart - things aren't so beautiful now part 2 Seems like years as the temple rings, Chokes gas with the awful news it brings. How comes she's been avoiding, She knows hes reached the end. Hooked up to the respirator, Please laugh into my callud lungs. My hearbeats getting fainter, And all my time has gone. It's getting colder, Deciding to show her that i'm not the one, To be there beside her, now I'm crossing overcan no one can show her. I know she'll remain, with no way to end this pain. No one seems to realize, the things that I, The things that I've done to you. Why do you paint your love with all your heart, with all that a heart can give. Intentions that you'll never know, The reason why I had to lead astray. I gave you a last time, a painted remorse. (Mistakes that were never yours) The wrong in my life can never relate, it flashes before my eyes... (How did he come to this, His mind is working harder then ever before, Thousands of thoughts in seconds, His last thoughts were of her...) (And how he and he alone had destroyed the once vibrant spirit he had inherited so deeply. The last pain he had ever caused is to the only woman that had ever loved him..) The bright light is calling me over, I follow and leave you alone .Now you're all alone, And I leave you with nobody by your side, Not to hurt you ever again, Never break your spirit's torment. Now I'm all alone, Still a cherish with the things you gave into me The bright light is calling me over, I follow and leave you alone. |
| Thursday, September 15 |
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Last night was great. went out to town and played pool and went to watch movie. I was so tired that i made lots of mistake while playing pool. There was a couple of times where i forgot which ball that i was suppose to shoot. hahaha. i got back home at 12midnight... sigh, i really miss that person. always sms her.... but due to her busy working enviroment, she won't reply. but never mind la... i understand. its okay. i will just wait. this weekend, i will try not to go out... shall stay at home, mediate myself and recuperate. i need money......somebody please donate money to me please.... hahahahahaha.... |
| Wednesday, September 14 |
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i am that so damn bored right now in the office but lucky me i had the leisure to have a computer with an internet access... UNLIKE JI CHUAN( he is in the same office with me) who is like walking around like office boy... while i sit down here and shake my leg. this is so great. hahahahahaha. im not too sure about kenneth and serene cos they are in different levels. time really pass by fast while working down here. really, this is the best ever job. ntuc income is so damn rich to employ people like me. damn i'm lucky this time round. i'm so tired... i need a damn good rest. anyway, g'day you all! |
| Tuesday, September 13 |
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[one more chance, please] oh god, i am like so damn busy. i got an office job at ntuc income. ji chuan's girlfriend helped us to get it... then, i brought kenneth and serene in. so now 4 of us working at that ntuc income office... we are not selling insurance... but doing data entry la, bla bla bla... but its good money. last week, for 4 days, ntuc income attached me to help out in a internal seminar they had for their own staff at the rendevous hotel(near plaza singapura). the seminar was a skill development program for their staff... the reason i was there, i was to assist the lecturer on his powerpoint slides and help to do some little programming as well as setting up the presentation equipment..... so yah, i was there, most of the time pressing the 'spacebar' button on the laptop from 9am-5pm. never mind, it was cool. the coolest job i ever had - pressing the 'spacebar' on the laptop keyboard from 9am-5pm and get paid 50bucks for that. cool shit right? ntuc income is so rich la..... but now, im back to their office, do data entry and stuff like that... like shit la. but nvm... at the end of the month, i'll be laughing my way to the bank.. hahahahahaha... i had a short movie marathon on sunday, watched 'perfect catch' and 'one more chance'.... nice movies. oh yah, i met AUNTY last week. had dinner with her at chinatown. it was fun hanging out with her and she had to realise i wore bright green socks with smart attire. damn, so paisei. wanna know about some funny incident? but i felt so unlucky about it. anyway, we were at the traffic light at chinatown... i was new to that place... seriously, i never walked at chinatown before. i was looking around.... waiting for the traffic light to turn red. there was this two teenage girls behind us. incoincidentally when i was turning my head behind, one of the girls was like whining...'ITS SO SMALL!!!'.... then when i finally completed my head turn, i HAD to bloody witness her squeezing her boobs in the public and complaining that it was SMALL. i could barely guess her age man... she's young lor... i guess she could be 14..?? sial la.. i know guys would love to see that happen la... but not me man... especially when young girls.... im not ti ko peh okay. duh. -_-" to aunty, i DON'T SOUND LIKE TALIB OKAY! REALLY LA! HAHAHA! okay, got to sleep now. this week, i need to work from 8.30am - 11pm for 4 days... |
| Tuesday, September 6 |
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[excuse me, do i look like a waiter to you?] last friday was sad bcos of the farewells at my old attachement place.... kinda missed my colleagues. i took pictures with them.. will post it soon. then at night, we went to phuture. TALIB (who self acclaimed in my tagboard that he's hot and i know that 5+1 is him =)) pangseh us last minute on friday... so he left me, harith and my classmates. we club till we drop but phuture was really boring la on friday. fuck dj tony tan. should have gone to chinablack but fuck la, by 10pm the queue damn long la... kanina.... its all becos of the SMU bash held there. but nvm, i would love to know if they will expand phuture as zouk will be closed for 1 month renovation. anyway, on saturday, i did nothing much.... went to woodlands.... then met the rest to town. and that night itself, i can never forget how a 19years old boy SULKED badly. there were 5 of us playing 5man pool. we played politics and tried to get rid of irwank first. indeed he was get rid off first. for two games he kena bullied and in the end he sulked and don't want to play... i wonder what has army done to him? he's a seargeant now and have childish attitude. hahahaha. fuck la irwan, since u are taking the GPMG(general purpose machine gun) course, go shove those big gpmg bullets up your arse man. hahaha. on sunday, for the first time in my life, i had that famous nasi lemak at adam road with the guys. it was fun having this kind of trips whereby you are willing to go to that distance to hunt for good food. monday, presentation of our attachment! i think i can become an event organiser one day. its always me who planned an outing for my class. hahahaha. i was bored la while waiting for my turn to present, then i asked my classmates to go town have dinner. yeah, we went to cafe cartel @ cineleisure and then went to boat quay. there was 10 of us. all the guys were wearing long sleeve shirt, pants and smart shoes. JC, shanxiong and kenneth, they look like a salesman! hahahaha.... but so much for disturbing them... i was wearing white long sleeve shirt and black pants. do i look like a waiter to you? i was at the cashier la, making my order.... then i was like looking at the table behind me as the cashier was entering my order... then, there's this lady who approached me and straight away, 'we got 7 people and can u set the table for us?' I FELT INSULTED LA! hahaha. i stared at her and told her, 'excuse me, im not working here!' the lady damn paisei la after that. HAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHA. can't she see that the cafe cartel waiter and waitress wear a black uniform unless she thinks that im a manager or what....oh btw, do i have that manager kind of look? LOL! after dinner at cafe cartel, we went to boat quay. went to a pub called SAHARA. very cool place. we SMOKE sheesha at sahara. my first time trying that as well as eelynn and meiqi. hahaha. my sugar baby eelynn, tried smoking that sheesha... she tried so hard to blow the air out from her nose but she couldnt!!! and she had that cute sotong face that time la.... hahahahahaha! at least meiqi could do it lor. k la, im tired already. talk again soon. bye! |
| Thursday, September 1 |
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you know, my colleague at work once told me this..... Married is like Working a Full Time Job and Single is like You are Still Schooling. That guy who told me is a 35years old indian guy and he's my best friend in my attachment work place. so contradicting of me yeah? but yeah, he's a nice person. we always talk about common things. anyway, back to that sentence, yes, working is like a commitment that u have to fulfill in order to survive and same goes to marriage. working means u have little social life and you have to pay full attention to your job in order to maintain your job. in marriage, you have to stick through thick and thin with ur partner in life to maintain your marriage. Being single is like your are still schooling. In school, you are learning and searching for the meaning of things that you have learnt independently. Being single is like searching for some soul mate and learning every single aspect of a person that u have just met. whatever it is, tomorrow is my last day of attachment. the more i think about it, the more sad i am. i will miss those uncles. i will miss waking up early. i will miss the early morning bus ride. and there's one particular person that i will miss and that will never get to read this. i will miss all the fun. because all along, working 8am-5pm daily have kept me occupied from alot of things. i hate farewells and graduations. =( |
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[what the fuck?] There are things in this life that i seek and long for but I found out that I'm gonna give up on it for now and put it aside. Tired of living this life in searching for it. I don't think its the right time yet. I should do other things according to importance and preference. Sometimes i just find it hard to continue, failed halfway due to uncertainty and low in morale. But i've now made up my mind. I'll stop looking for it. I thought my youth is over, but i realised that its just the beginning. No matter how old i am, i believe that there's still the spirit of youth that never dies in me. Why frown and be sad everyday? Don't you think its a waste of time to search for it for years but still unsuccessful? Maybe i should just focus on my needs first rather than searching for things that i can't force to let it come by. People come and leave. How many times have i tried? How many times have i missed it? How many times have i failed? Damn, this scars are here to remind that the past is all real. I gave up love. |
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